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The books our Rebuilders keep coming back to
35 books, gathered over years and grouped by what you might need right now. Start with the two Rebuilding books at the top; the rest are here for whenever a particular part of this gets loud. Shared in the spirit of community, not as endorsements.
The Rebuilding books
If you read nothing else, read these two. They are the framework the whole 10-week class is built on.
- Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends →
Bruce Fisher's classic, and the backbone of everything we do. The nineteen building blocks, in his own words.
- The Rebuilding Workbook →
The companion workbook. The exercises that turn the reading into real movement, one block at a time.
Shame, self-esteem, and coming home to yourself
The block most people underestimate. FLY, first love yourself, starts here.
- Healing the Shame that Binds You →
John Bradshaw on the shame that sits underneath so much of what we do. This is core reading for the shame work.
- Daring Greatly →
Brené Brown on vulnerability. Masks off, imperfectly enough. It reads like it was written for a Rebuilding room.
- Bradshaw On: The Family →
- Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques →
- The Feeling Good Handbook →
- The Narcissistic Family: Diagnosis and Treatment →
Anger, grief, and letting the fire burn down
Fisher likens divorce anger to a fire that has to burn down to the ashes of forgiveness. These help.
Understanding the relationship, and the next one
Making sense of what happened, and the difference between attractions of deprivation and relationships of inspiration.
For your children
Helping the kids through it, and understanding who they are becoming.
Mindfulness, meaning, and the quieter path
Bob's contemplative shelf. When you need something to steady you rather than fix you.
- When Things Fall Apart →
Pema Chödrön. The book people quietly tell us got them through the worst weeks.
- Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living →
- Loving Kindness: The Revolutionary Art of Happiness →
- Insight Meditation: A Step-By-Step Course →
- Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind →
- Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy →
- New Passages →
- An Autobiography: The Story of My Experiments With Truth →
- A Testament of Hope: Writings of Martin Luther King, Jr. →
- The Kingdom of God Is Within You →
Reading is good company. So is a room full of Rebuilders.
When you're ready to do the work alongside other people, we're here. A free 15-minute call is a gentle place to start.
Book your free 15-minute call